Decatur has a great networking community for young professionals called the 501 Club, which I belong to; though I’m not sure why because I’m not a professional at anything and I’m not really that young either.  When the club first began it was for “young” career and civic minded individuals up to the age of 35.  Someone must of told them that 36 wasn’t really that old because the cut off date was recently bumped up to 40.  I wonder if they’ll be pressured to keep bumping that age limit?  How about 45?  50? Premortem?  The very existence of the 501 Club has always been a major bummer to me – it’s been a constant reminder that I’ll soon be slipping into the abyss of old age.  I’ll be 38 in December and my carriage will soon turn into a  DMH Primetime van and my glass slippers into orthopedic shoes.   I can hear the ticking of the clock in my head or is that just my hearing aid?  Someone needs to tell the 501 Club that 40 isn’t really that old either but it’s a sin to lie!  I’m getting old!  Time is running out.  I’ll soon be worm chow.  Tick. Tick. Tick.  Thanks a lot 501 Club for rubbing it in!

“Decatur sucks!”  “Decatur is a dying town.” “Decatur Stinks – and it’s not just ADM!”  “Will the last one to leave please turn the lights off.”  If you’ve been living in Decatur for any length of time, I’m sure you’ve heard or read all of those classic lines.  I try to avoid the Herald & Review’s Letter’s to the Editor Blog like the plague, but once in a while I’ll pop in, and it never fails; someone will say something nice about Decatur and a gang of ravenous attack dogs will slobber over their unsuspecting prey.  “Oh, another sappy, delusional Decaturite has written something positive about Decatur – they must be Chamber puppets or looking through rose colored glasses because Decatur sucks!  Anybody with a brain knows that!”  Just try and throw out an idea to improve downtown and you might as well hand out whips, strip naked and strap yourself to a pole and prepare yourself for the onslaught of stinging remarks and put downs.  What’s wrong with us?  I guess that’s a study for Sociology or Psychology 101.  Maybe it’s not unique to Decatur but it’s really getting old.

I know Decatur has been through a lot, and faces a lot of problems, but it goes against my grain to just give up.  Maybe it’s just a feeling of helplessness, or not knowing where to put our energy, but if we want to make one big contribution to our community, without having to do a whole lot, – let’s stop putting Decatur down and putting each other down.  That would go a LONG WAY!  All I can say is, “Will the first one please turn the lights on!”

This is a sappy song but put on your rose colored glasses and sing along!

Here is the real transcript of Hillary Clinton’s inteview:

I really wish I were anywhere but here but I have been instructed by the DNC to encourage my voters to vote for Barack Obama, who will be the next president of the United States (of Neptune.)

—

Well, I just started out with a great breakfast with the New York delegation, whom won’t have the opportunity to vote for me at the convention because well – they voted for me.

—

I’m on my way to the Hispanic caucus, where I hope to find Bill Richardson and kick him in the groin.

—

Well, I’m looking forward to seeing a lot of old and new backstabbers at the convention and telling them where to go and how to get there.

—

I’m also looking forward to making history when we nominate Senator Obama (speaking his name as quickly as possible so as not to taste the syllables.) It will be a wonderful night – if this were a Disney movie and not reality.

—

I really appreciate Senator Obama and his campaign working me over so closely at our meeting behind the Greasy Chicken Cafe in Denver – though the brass-knuckles were kind of unnecessary!

—

I just hope that we have the opportunity to do what is traditionally done in an election – like letting people vote. (Like that’s gonna happen!)

—

Of course, we’ll have a great night when Senator Obama gives his speech at Invesco Field. (Hopefully it will be the last time, I’ll have to pretend to like him.)

—

I’m really getting a kick out of John McCain using my ads and saying the things I couldn’t.

—

I’m Hillary Clinton and I don’t approve of this convention (a four day painful infomercial that is nauseating to watch, let alone participate in.)

—

See you in 2012!

If there’s one thing I’ve learned this past primary season, it’s that most Obama supporters have absolutely no sense of humor. I’ve never spoken to a group of people that are so adamant, so sure, so positive that Barack Obama is “The One”. That’s always scared me. I have to admit there’s been this stray thought running through my mind wondering if Obama is the Anti-Christ! The mesmerizing charm that he has over his flock is kinda freaky. He can do no wrong in their eyes. Just Google “Obama the Anti-Christ” and you’ll have enough reading material for the next century. Of course, that doesn’t’ really prove anything. Every leader for the past 2,000 years has had that Anti-Christ question mark hanging over their head; but we’re all soon relieved to learn that our leaders are mere mortals when they trip down a flight of stairs exiting Air Force One, spell potato wrong, announce their vice-presidential pick as the president, or get caught with a White House intern a third their age. Whew! It’s so relieving, because nobody that dumb or clumsy (i.e., human) could be the Anti-Christ!  But then again, maybe that would be the perfect disguise. If everybody already thinks you’re a creep or a moron, they’d never suspect you! Maybe we’ve been looking in the wrong place.

Personally, I think it’s healthy and wise to hold our leaders and politicians with contempt. I just wish Obama supporters would start doing more of that and then maybe I’d jump on board. Oh well, do I really believe Barack is the Anti-Christ? No, I’m not that ridiculous, but he sure is the Anti-Clinton – which in my book is pretty darn close!

You have to admit this is pretty funny…err unless you’re an Obama supporter.

Faith Camfield, who is a friend of my daughter, has recently been diagnosed with Acute Myelogenous Leukemia. She just finished her first round of chemotherapy at St. John’s Children’s Hospital in Springfield. My daughter played with Faith on the Redbird Rookies team this year, went swimming with her at Fairview Park and played a couple mean rounds of mini-golf at Paul’s Puttin Place this summer. Faith loves her dogs, rabbits and cat. She’s 9 years old and has an upbeat personality. She wants to be a fashion designer when she grows up. A benefit to help cover some of her medical expenses is to be held for her at Rotary Park in Decatur on September 27 & 28th.

This is a softball tournament and teams can enter for $200. There will also be games and activities for the kids. Last day to sign up for the tournament is Thursday September 25th. For more information, please call Justin Neufeld at 429-3472 or email jneufeld@decparks.com.

If you would like to make a donation to the Camfield family, donations can be sent to the Pamela Faith Camfield Healthcare Fund, in care of Soy Capital Bank & Trust, 455 N. Main St., Decatur, IL 62523